As a therapist, my most frequent request is to “Improve Communication.” The family will express they, “don’t communicate well,” however, what I find is that they do communicate well; they just don’t use appropriate communication techniques.
There is an unconscious quality that some call “presence,” others call “attitude,” and all of which try to explain “what is it that you fill the room with?”
We all have leaders and we usually judge them by asking “what kind of leader is he or she?” and “must I respect them?” This starts very early on. For example, in the movie Kindergarten Cop, tough man Arnold Schwarzenegger gets pushed around by a bunch of kindergarteners. By high school, however; we quickly ascertain whether this teacher is one you have to respect or one that let’s you slide by.
Addiction is an unfortunate but common issue that many families have to deal with, and families in business together are no exception. When a family member has an addiction—be it drugs, sex, gambling, or alcohol—the issue must be addressed in order to have long-term family harmony and stability. This is especially critical if the addict is the anticipated successor. Un-addressed, addiction can wreak havoc on a succession plan.
What happens to the child who was different from the rest of the family and was ignored and neglected during childhood? This is a family dynamic that deserves attention. Children need to be noticed, comforted and nurtured to help them find their way in the world. Some children are an easy fit for their parents while other children are much harder for the parents to understand and manage.